SoD: “The Cows are in the Corn”

(Original: http://landonartexp.com/humor1.htm)

The Cows Are In The Corn
Regular Song Version; tune is improvised by Milk Leader and Praise Band

the cows are in the corn
the cows are in the corn
the cows are in the corn
the cows are in the corn

(volume up a notch)
the cows are in the corn
the cows are in the corn
the cows are in the corn
the cows are in the corn

(key change)
the cows are in the corn
the cows are in the corn
the cows are in the corn
the cows are in the corn

(drum shift with increased tempo)
the corn, the cows
the corn, the cows
the corn, the cows
the corn, the cows

(the lead guitar beginning to start thumping and the bass up the key and drum up the pace)
the the the the
cows, cows, cows, cows
are, are, are ,are
in, in, in, in
corn, corn, corn, corn

cows areinthecorn
cows areinthecorn
cows areinthecorn
cows are in the corn

(improv ending in a key change)
cowsare in thecorn
(volume up a notch)
cowsare in thecorn
(volume up a nothces)
cowsare in thecorn
(volume up a notch)
the cows are in the corn

(at this point the backup singers begin put you hands into the air and making fists and pulling down the milking leader tells everyone to “embrace the utters and let the corn fall”)

the cows,

(milk leader now beginning to weep visibly)

OH the cows, Those precious cows,
My precious cows, Your precious cows
Her precious cows, His precious cows

(at this point the dance team enters dressed as milk maids each with a milk stool followed by men dressed in farmer costumes with giant dowel sticks with flowing golden 3 foot wide ribbon with painter corn ears which are waved over the congregation)

are in
the corn
(all instruments slam)
the corn
(all instruments slam)
the corn
(all instruments slam)

TTTTTTTTTHHHHHHHHHHHeeeeee CCCCCCCOOOOOOOORRRRRRRNNNNNNNN

(at this point all the dances fall on their face and the milkleader falls exhausted on one knee as a giant inflated cow is carried by four men dressed as ears of corn through the congregation as the instruments frantically play on)

At this point all members of the congregation should look at each other and smile knowing from the warm milky feeling they share that the fertilizer has flown freely here today.